Assume! - A key to marriage.

You ever heard the slogan. "When you assume you make a _____ out of you and me." Only partly true. Let me explain. Assumptions that makes us look stupid is when make decisions with not enough or bad information. It's when we fill in the blanks of a story with our own words. The problem is we rarely fill in the blanks correctly because our assumptions are based upon what another is thinking of which we have no ability to know. Those kind of assumptions destroy relationships, especially marriages.

That is why the right assumption is based upon what you know; and that is you. What if in a marriage we would assume it is us and not our spouse. The assumption that it is our spouse with the issue is convenient. I won't lie; it feels better to place the blame on another. Who likes looking into their own heart to see what kind of darkness is actually there. The problem is, that you have no control over the other persons heart or mind. But you do have power. The power you have is influence.

Here is how influence works. Influence is the ability to win the heart and mind of another. You know how you do that. Bible say's, "A new command I give you; Love one another. As I have loved you, so you MUST love one another." Here is the secret to love. It has nothing to do with the other person. It has everything to do with the size and capacity of your heart to love despite. Influence is when you choose to act out of love not matter where we think the blame lies because our goal is not the conflict it is the outcome.

If you want to assume anything, try this. Try assuming not the blame but the responsibility for the success of your marriage. Men; this is a key place you can lead in your homes. Let's put down our pride, our ego's (which are real), and our need to be right for the calling of beautiful marriages. Assuming responsibility means looking inside ourselves for darkness, confessing it to God, then acting toward our spouse's in love. Let your influence grow in their hearts by your ability to be humble, assume responsibility and act in love. Pursue them as God pursued us. Your marriage is not beyond repair (redemption). It starts with you.

Don't stop assuming. Assume more!