As parents we determine the quality of the relationships our kids have one to another . We create the culture and that culture is set deep into the hearts of our kids. Our values then dictate that, culture. Our values are not what we would like to live; they're what we live. Every decision we make, bad and good, set and reinforce our values. Jacob and his wives set the culture for their family. It was kids for me and my satisfaction and gain. Their kids were born out of an emotional need to satisfy an emptiness within themselves. So they compromised everything in order to have them. Funny how that value didn't die with the birth of their kids, rather it was fueled by their arrival. Now their kids became chess pieces for them to gain first place in the eyes of Jacob. The need to satisfy the emptiness in their soul was not satisfied by the arrival of their kids. So their personal selfish need bred dissension. The family value became personal gain and favor in the eyes of Jacob.
Guess who inherited that value? The kids. Not just the children of the maidservants given by Jacobs wives to Jacob so they could have these bargaining chips. But Joseph as well. The son of Jacob and his real wife. Jacob then is as guilty. His own prejudice becomes the driving force for his families disfunction. The scripture said he favored Joseph over the others and when the others realized it, which happens as kids grow up, they hated Joseph. Kids are not dumb. They smell our values.
So as parents, how do we discover our values? Look at the kids values. They usually reflect our own. Then it's the hard work of expressing and living consistently the new values. Thats for the next post.
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